My Lists of the Year 2014By Jon Evans
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Welcome to my GOTY list for 2014. As you can see, I've had a bit of fun with these, but there are real, uesful reviews attached to many off the winners below, so if you are keen to dip into them, click on the 'read more' link, where available, to get to the full review. Remember, release date is immaterial, these are games played in 2014...
Top 5 Games to play on the Toilet
5 - Killzone Mercenary (Vita)
Probably the best first person shooter on the Vita. A solid campaign that is chopped up into 25 minute episodes that allows you to play in handy short periods of time. The addition of bot mode for the multiplayer allows you some sweet multiplayer action without needing to play against real people. It also means you can pause the multiplayer when you need to wipe. AAA style games are dying out on the vita as it veers towards being an indie game machine, so this game should be cherished.
2 - OlliOlli
Possibly one of the best skate games ever made. A simple mechanic that allows for actually very deep and addictive gameplay. skate over various levels while performing a variety of tricks, and meeting objectives all in a 2D side scrolling environments. You will fall over a lot, but want to keep going to unlock the elusive Rad mode. Warning! Due to the nature of the 'just one more level' phneomomen, long bouts of OlliOlli on the toilet may lead to haemorrhoids.
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4 - Velocity 2X
Sequel to Velocity Ultra, 2X is a vertical scrolling shmup/teleporter/platformer. Beautiful design, interesting and humourous story, awesome gameplay and exacting attention to detail will make this game onto a lot of GOTY lists this year. A vita must-have and again each level is short and sweet enough to play for brief stints on The khazi.
1 - Desert Golfing
The critics choice. Desert Golfing is a simple concept. You play in procedurally drawn desert levels where you ping your golf ball into the hole using a pull back mechanic used in Angry Birds. No leaderboards, no retry button, your score is permanently recorded and the holes go on for ever. Addictive as sugar coated crack cocaine. Also helps for those difficult aiming moments when 'having a no 1'.
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3 - Threes
A simple mathematical puzzle game where you combine numbers in multiples of 3, to keep your board clear and rack up points. Combining multiples of three to higher amounts gives you higher point mulitpliers. A combination of pure and precise design, with cute sounds from each counter makes for one of the best games to play with one hand while standing at the toilet. Spawned literally hundreds of clones in the App Store, but this is the first and the best.
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Top 5 games I wish I'd never bloody bought.
5 - Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare
I admit it. I was pulled in by Kevin Spacey too. Not one of the worse COD games by far, as long as you don't mind a fairly mundane, on-rails, campaign with some interesting set pieces, but don't enjoy the guns too much as they get whipped away from you as soon as you fall in love with them. Also has the most blatant rip off of frogger in any game to date. The multiplayer is good and probably the best iteration so far, but frankly I can't be arsed to play with the COD crowd.
2 - Killzone Shadowfall
Looks great, but is dull as dishwater. Completely forgettable campaign with a very foggy signposting system. Multiplayer is fine and functional but doesn't compare with Killzone 2 or 3. Pretty much the nail in the coffin for the Killzone franchise, but as a launch game, Guerrilla had to get it out quick. Go and play Mercenary, it's more fun (see above).
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4 - Virtua Tennis 4 World Tour Edition
Still in its wrapper. I don't even like tennis that much. What was I thinking?
1 - Destiny
If you listen to our podcasts, you'll know I love this game, but I feel betrayed by this cruel temptress. She's lured me in with a promise of a universe of worlds to explore and adventures to have with my friends, but a lacklustre story, limited environments, missions repeated ad Infinitum and overpriced DLC that made you do the same missions backwards, means that this game is only for the seriously masochistic. Trouble is it has sparks of sheer excellence and the PvP is jolly good fun...I might just have one more go...
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3 - Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee – New 'n' Tasty!
A great game and homage to the original. I'll probably get round to playing it eventually, it's just one of those games that gets pushed to the back of the list of games I play. Will probably be on PS+ at some point which means I should have waited.
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Top five comics with the best use of bodily mutilation
5 - Spread
Spread is a post apocalyptic story in the vein of The Last of Us (although planned and conceived before that game came out) with the central character, No, protecting a very special child. A virus has Spread which turns all flesh into a massive violent animated gory organism which is after more blood to grow. The artwork is fabulous and the grotesques that Jordan and Strahm create are some of the most chilling and terrifying of any comic.
2 - Deadly Class
An ultra violent school for assassins that doesn't shy away from graphic representation of violence. It's also a brilliant coming of age story for the main character as he not only deals with all the problems of fitting into a new high school but also has to endure the various trials and tribulations of becoming a world class killer.
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4 - Southern Bastards
Earl Tubb arrives back in his small home town in the south. His father is a well known cop, famous in the town for beating assailants on his doorstep to death with a baseball bat, but he has now passed away so Earl has come to arrange his father's affairs. While he is there he discovers a menacing undercurrent in the town involving the local football team and their coach. This comic is pretty graphic and violent, with injuries involving a deep fat fryer and lots more eponymous baseball bat action. With wonderful stylistic drawing and an authentic script, Southern Bastards is a series to watch.
1 - Zero
A mind boggling examination of dark espionage, with all the subtle politicking of its characters, but also a deeper, weirder look into a world that has changed beyond our comprehension. With striking artwork, and an obsessive compulsive level of detail in every corner of the comic pages, Zero is utterly compelling in its story telling and has a gruesome realism in its violence.
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3 - Chew
Tony Chu (see what they did there?) is a Philly PD Cop who has a very unusual condition. He is cibopathic; this allows him to visualise the history of an item by chewing on it. It also means he struggles to eat anything without seeing its past. Chu, a reluctant vegetarian lives on a beetroot-only diet. It’s Interesting to see all the disgusting things (read animal and body parts) he has to ingest in the line of duty, but also for the quirky dialogue and imaginative characterisations.
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